Call it what you want: a Hallmark holiday or a day to appreciate love. Either way, Valentine’s Day is the day that people love to hate and hate to love. However, it can be lonely if you’re spending the day by yourself. What are you supposed to do when everyone around you has a significant other or is spending the day with someone they love? 

I try to look at the positive side of Valentine’s Day. I don’t have to spend my money on someone or take them out to a nice dinner. That might sound depressing, but I can instead use the money that I’m not spending on the Hallmark holiday to buy something nice for myself. I’ll admit, when the day actually comes around, it does feel a bit lonely. But, that’s okay; that’s the point. Society has wired our brains to feel pressure to not be alone on Valentine’s Day. 

The holiday is the same date every year, and yet, somehow, singles are still shocked when Cupid doesn’t show up. But, every year, I don’t do anything about it. I refuse to be the person that starts dating someone for the sole purpose of having a valentine. Yes, the hypothetical “relationship” might turn out to be something great, but starting a relationship just because you don’t want to be lonely for one specific week out of an entire year seems a bit selfish to me. 

There is also the stereotypical idea that people who are single are extremely bitter about the holiday, and us singles can never experience a day of peace. While we might be spending Valentine’s Day with ourselves or with our “galentines,” there will be years in the future where we might spend the entirety of “cuffing season” with the loves of our lives. We just have to wait a bit to get to where we need to be. 

But for right now, my advice for singles is simple: don’t fall into the trap of Valentine’s Day. The day might be an excuse for restaurants to jack up their prices, chocolate to be wrapped in  heart-shaped boxes, florist shops to sell more flowers than any other day of the year and couples to dedicate an entire day to their relationship, but you don’t have to buy into all that. Put on an “anti-Valentine’s Day” song playlist, throw on “10 Things I Hate About You” and take a deep breath. 

Being alone for a little while might hurt, but the hurt only has to last until the love bug can sneak up and bite you when you’re least expecting it. Just remember to trust the process, and when you see Cupid with his arrows, duck!