A twist on a holiday classic

‘Twas the week before finals, and all through St. Joe’s

Not a student was ready, not even lax bros.

A sense of fear now hung in the air

For the week of finals soon would be there.

Each freshman felt they were on their deathbed.

Sophomores and juniors had minds full of dread.

Sad seniors felt it was time to wrap;

They quietly prepared, thinking “Man, I need a nap.”

Each student checked the syllabus, “How much does this grade matter?”

They studied so much, their heads could simply shatter.

Schedules all soon turned into a mad dash

Tell me, while reading, can eyes get whiplash?

But in the back of each mind, did every student know

That winter break would soon be in tow.

The whispers of one brave soul did I hear,

“The stress of this week shall soon disappear.”

When finals seem to hit like a brick,

Free snacks and library puppies always do the trick.

Now with the knowledge that the week would not be a shame,

The students finally began to exclaim:

“Now psych, now English, now bio and accounting!

You are a challenge I’ll soon be surmounting!

This week shall not be my downfall!

My exams I shall pass one and all!”

And they all survived, no need to cry.

They got ready, each to say their Christmas goodbye.

The semester was ending, the students all knew,

Fortunately everyone had made it through.

Freshmen packed up, they finally had proof—

Their college careers were no mere goof.

And as sophomores and juniors left campus grounds,

They had years of college left to hang around.

But seniors left campus, wanting to stay put:

Their final semester would soon be afoot.

Their minds were filled with memories, as they looked back.

There was a twinge of nostalgia in each Thursday throwback.

It’s the same story each year, now let’s all get to work—

The library will be the best place to lurk.

For every student should always know,

Finals week stress is a temporary woe.

And as we get ready for our winter dismissal,

I hope you are comforted by this finals week missile.

As I sign off for the semester, I shall be forthright:

Happy finals to all, and to all a goodnight!