I am the son of two Mexican immigrants, the oldest of three siblings and a first generation American and college student. When choosing a college to go to, I had no one in my immediate family to turn to for advice on what I should do, what I should look for, and what the rest of my educational and future career path should be like.
Being the first left me completely alone. While there was faculty at my high school who I could turn to, which I did, there’s nothing like reassurance from someone close to you who has already walked the path you’re going down.
It was liberating in a way, being able to choose virtually anything for myself, but also terrifying. It came with an overwhelming burden of having to succeed.
Having no one to guide me and being a very self determined 18 year old, I chose to move practically as far away as possible from my home (666 miles away to be exact). At the moment, it felt right. But once I got to St. Joe’s in the fall of 2018, during that first night, I felt weirdly disconnected from everything. I was alone.
It was also the first time that I had enrolled in a predominantly white institution, which only made the experience more isolating. In high school, the only white people were the teachers, and everyone else was either Black or of Latin American descent. That’s not to say that people at St. Joe’s weren’t friendly, but it turned out that I now had no one in my vicinity that shared a similar life experience.
It’s been three years now. I find myself a less self-determined 22 year old who is sort of going with the flow, to say the least. In many ways, my experience is still unique on this campus, but I no longer find solitude in it. I see it as a means to communicate my unique perspective to the friends and peers that I’ve made along the way. I’ve found spiritual guidance within Campus Ministry, as well as career and life choice-making guidance from my mentor in the Institute of Clinical Bioethics.
I’ve become sort of a mentor to my two younger sisters as one navigates college and the other is soon to begin the college application process. Being the first to go to college is a monumental step within my family.
From now on, my sisters and I will be able to provide guidance for my extended family members, some of whom are also the first to attend college within their respective families.
