Thomas Betterly ’24 is a mathematics and secondary education double major who works as the head resident assistant of Villiger Hall and as an orientation leader. But one of his biggest passions is working in Campus Ministry. He serves as a peer minister, a member of the SJU Chapel Choir and the SJU Handbell Choir. Betterly was also one of the leaders on the first-year SPARK retreat held last semester.
The Hawk: It seems like a large portion of your time is dedicated to music. When did you first start singing?
Betterly: I have been involved in musical theater since I was in third grade. My family has been a part of a community theater group since as far as I can remember. My sister danced. The performing arts were nothing new to my family, so I became part of it, just really low-key, nothing too crazy. The people that ran our community theater group sang in the folk group at our church, so I got involved with that, singing at Sunday masses.
The Hawk: While music is a big part of your activities on campus, the other half seems to be faith-related. How long has religion been a part of your life?
Betterly: I was baptized into the Catholic Church shortly after I was born, and it was something that my family took very seriously. I went to Sunday Mass every week because that was what we did. I knew I was going to get woken up at 10 o’clock [with], “Okay, get in the shower. We’ve got to go to the 11 o’clock mass.” I went to Catholic school my whole life as well. And then it was in high school where I sort of made faith my own thing. It wasn’t just a list of things that you had to do, right? It wasn’t just “I go to church because my family does.” It’s, “I go to church because I want to.”
The Hawk: What would you say was the defining moment for your faith life?
Betterly: The first answer that comes to my mind is a retreat that I went on in high school called Kairos. I know there’s a bunch of people who have a similar retreat in their high school, especially going to a Catholic school. For me, it was the first time that I really had perspective about my life. And other people’s lives are very eye opening. People go through bad things, and they still live their lives. They go through their struggles and challenges, but they’re resilient. It taught me that resilience is really important. It helped me see that in myself. And I think, Catholic or not, that’s a really important lesson, that human beings are resilient, that we suffer through challenges, we still come out more hardened than we were before. But then to have that attached to a community of faith? People that struggled with their faith like me, people who had these questions that they couldn’t answer, people who had fears and worries, it made me feel like I was not alone. It was my first real glimpse of a faith-based community.
The Hawk: What are some of the faith difficulties you’ve had?
Betterly: The biggest challenge of my faith is other people, and I mean that in the most sincere way. Seeing where they stand in faith really makes you question what you believe in yourself. It makes you question the role of an institution like the Church. Hearing how people have been turned away or harmed or disregarded by the things that I look up to is very challenging. …
Coming to St. Joe’s and hearing about people’s experiences with different difficulties and struggles just makes you really wonder: Am I doing the right thing? But I always rely back on my experiences because I’m the master of my own experience and no one else’s. You can tell me your experience. It doesn’t mean I’m going to understand it. It doesn’t mean I will fully understand it the way that you do, because you lived it. So knowing these things, it makes you wonder: Can I say that I’m a part of an inclusive environment, even though the Church is pretty clear with their opinions on women being ordained and the role of homosexuality in the Church, and the way that the Church has affected marginalized communities? It’s very difficult, and something that I have to grapple with every day.
The Hawk: You mentioned community. What does that mean to you in terms of your faith?
Betterly: Hand in hand with faith and spirituality is community. And I am painfully aware of the flaws of the Catholic Church and the Catholic faith and some of the very contested issues that are deal breakers for a lot of people. And I understand that to the best extent that I could. I know that sometimes it’s not popular to say, “Oh, yeah, I’m a Catholic,” or write all of these things about a relationship with God, because I know people have negative experiences like that. But the motto of Campus Ministry at Saint Joseph’s is “Come as you are, all are welcome.” And I truly believe that we mean that.
