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The Student News Site of St. Joseph's University

The Hawk News

The Student News Site of St. Joseph's University

The Hawk News

The Student News Site of St. Joseph's University

The Hawk News

GRAPHIC: CARA HALLIGAN ’25/THE HAWK

Baseball is boring

Carter Karpinski ’25, Columnist March 26, 2025

With baseball season almost upon us, I need to ask: Can we stop pretending it’ll ever be as entertaining as football? I’ve met far too many people who say baseball is their favorite sport. Are we watching...

GRAPHIC: CARA HALLIGAN ’25/THE HAWK

A proposal to cut university wasteful spending

Carter Karpinski ’25, Columnist February 26, 2025

It is with great pleasure that I present my newest proposal in improving our wonderful school: the department of St. Joe’s logistics and organizational productivity (SLOP). The department of SLOP’s...

GRAPHIC: CARA HALLIGAN ’25/THE HAWK

A guide for participating in class when you have nothing good to say

Carter Karpinski ’25, Columnist February 12, 2025

I can only imagine the trauma held by professors from semesters of teaching blank squares with names over Zoom. Now, after a few years of full participation being possible again, it can amount to huge...

GRAPHIC: STEPHANIE SAVELA ’25/THE HAWK

New year, same thing: Reevaluating resolutions

Carter Karpinski, Columnist January 29, 2025

As of writing this, we are over three weeks into the year of our Lord, 2025, and honestly, nothing has really changed since covid-19. We’ve just been kind of coasting since then. Yet, every year we make...

GRAPHIC: CARA HALLIGAN ’25/THE HAWK

How to fail and appreciate it

Carter Karpinski, Columnist November 6, 2024

This semester, I did something I have done many times before: I withdrew from a class. I’ve probably done it a few too many times now, considering my advisor began his withdrawal approval email with...

GRAPHIC: CARA HALLIGAN ’25/THE HAWK

A brief history lesson on St. Joe’s basketball

Carter Karpinski, Columnist October 23, 2024

Like all other sports, basketball was probably invented right here in Philadelphia. For a long time, it was called the “ball-in-basket” game until the term “basketball” was famously coined by Philadelphia...

GRAPHIC: STEPHANIE SAVELA ’25/THE HAWK

Welcome to Saint Joe’s: A guide to campus living

Carter Karpinski, Columnist September 11, 2024

Welcome back to St. Joe’s! Or, if you’re new here, hi, nice to meet you! See how friendly we are? I’m going on my fifth year here, so I kind of get this whole college thing…Well, I mean I’ve...

graphic of street sign reading "carter's corner"

Tips to be a good employee and maximize your paycheck

Carter Karpinski, Columnist May 1, 2024

As the self-proclaimed “world’s best employee” that I am (I even made myself a mug that says that), I thought I would generously offer some tips so everyone else can attempt to compete with me. I...

graphic of street sign reading "carter's corner"

The college casserole: A recipe

Carter Karpinski April 24, 2024
A satire on cooking at college
graphic of street sign reading "carter's corner"

8 a.m. classes: A survival guide

Carter Karpinski April 10, 2024
A satire on how to thrive bright and early
graphic of street sign reading "carter's corner"

How to prevent procrastination

Carter Karpinski March 27, 2024
A satire on the best methods for getting work done
graphic of street sign reading "carter's corner"

How to deal with stress

Carter Karpinski March 20, 2024
A (mostly) satire on stress-relieving tactics 
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